


Parents

by A_fighter_like_Eowyn



Category: The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher (Video Game), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, Wiedźmin | The Witcher Series - Andrzej Sapkowski
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Comfort/Angst, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia Has Feelings, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia Loves Jaskier | Dandelion, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia Whump, Good Parent Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Good Parent Jaskier | Dandelion, Hurt/Comfort, Insecure Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Jaskier | Dandelion Has Feelings, Jaskier | Dandelion Loves Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Jaskier | Dandelion Whump, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Protective Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Protective Jaskier | Dandelion, Soft Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Soft Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion, Soft Jaskier | Dandelion
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-09
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-15 10:15:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29312436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_fighter_like_Eowyn/pseuds/A_fighter_like_Eowyn
Summary: Geralt beats himself up since he keeps thinking he is not a good enough father. Jaskier won't stand for this, obviously :-)
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia & Jaskier | Dandelion, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion
Comments: 1
Kudos: 24





	Parents

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Geraskier_Rights](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Geraskier_Rights/gifts), [panofaar](https://archiveofourown.org/users/panofaar/gifts).



"Appah!"

Jaskier whirled around, cradling the newly burnished lute that he had been about to place in its case. His face split instantly into a beaming smile as his eyes landed on his tottering daughter behind him.

"Bonnie! Baby, what are you _doing_ here?!", he cried in a singsong voice that rose in pitch, and knelt down to the ground, arms open wide. The widely smiling toddler rushed forward on wobbly feet and fell right into his waiting arms.

"Appah!", she said again, burrowing straight into her Papa's chest. Jaskier picked her up, squeezing her gently and inhaling deeply in her baby-smell and the smell of his own milk that clung to her soft skin and softer flaxen-white curls.

"Papa is going to sing tonight, did you know, baby? Papa's gonna play the lute, and sing songs of Dada's heroic feats, and dance around the tables, and his audience is going to learn what a noble-hearted valiant man your Dada is. Yes, Baby?", Jaskier danced around the room, twirling the little girl in his arms, making her giggle maniacally and emit squeals of glee.

"All right, all right ... that's more than enough, you two", Geralt announced as he entered the room, shaking his head in fond exasperation, "Darling, Papa needs to go to work. So here, come to my arms, my love."

It took a few minutes more of persuading, with Geralt bribing her with a little piece of honey-cake, for the baby girl to let go of her Papa and dive into her Dada's arms instead. Jaskier tickled her belly, making her double over in laughter until she was breathless. It was the first time, since the birth of their first child, that he was going out to perform again, and he was loath to leave the baby and his husband behind. But he missed singing and playing too, and Geralt had put his foot down and absolutely _insisted_ that Jaskier leave the house for a couple of hours and "get a breath of fresh air instead of remaining cooped up here", as he put it. 

"I shall miss having you in the audience", Jaskier confessed, curling into Geralt's chest as the bigger man pulled him in for a hug (all the while balancing the bouncing little girl on his other arm).

"Well, just a couple more months, and Bonnie will be one and a half. I am sure she will be fine with a bit of the noises in the tavern, and the two of us can go and enjoy your performance for an hour or so each evening when I do not have contracts to attend to", Geralt soothed, and placed a kiss on top of Jaskier's silken brown curls.

"I look forward to that", Jaskier mumbled into his husband's shoulder. "Also", he said, raising his head and looking Geralt straight in the eye, "You remember what I have told you, right? That you will do _just fine_ taking care of her yourself?"

Geralt's eyes immediately became downcast, and Jaskier's expression turned stern.

"Geralt..."

"Yes, yes, I know", the Witcher quickly attempted to placate his now-slightly-irate husband, "You have full faith in me and I should have full faith in myself as her father. Got it."

Jaskier glared at his Wolf some more for good measure, and then turned to receive a couple of sloppy kisses from his daughter on either cheek.

"You be good to Dada, sweetie, and don't give him too much trouble. I shall see you both in a few hours. Bye honey!"

******************************************************************************

Bonnie sat perched on Geralt's knee as he fed her some mashed potatoes and broccoli with butter. She was listening with rapt attention to the story he was telling her. Jaskier would be proud ... Geralt had come a long way from his monosyllabic, curt replies and noncommittal grunts. As his love for Jaskier had deepened, and he had realized with each passing day how important and indispensable the bard was to him, the more he had put in his efforts to open up, to communicate, to converse. And now, he was spinning a wild fairytale on the spot to keep his little baby girl entertained!

"All right, sweetheart, all done! What a good girl you are, honey! You finished the entire bowl! I am so proud of you", he planted several kisses all over the giggling, happy little baby, "And now, how about Bonnie watches her Dada do some gardening, hmm?"

He placed the bowl and spoon aside, then picking his daughter up in his arms, strode out to the garden. He had done most of the digging and tilling and adding of manure and compost the night before, and all he needed to do now was water some of his thirstier, more-easily-parched plants and saplings. He was always careful with his garden tools when Bonnie was close by, and he always kept a close eye on her whenever he had to tend to his garden with her waddling around.

"All right, love, sit here", he placed her carefully on a smooth slab of stone with her feet dangling a little above the ground. The watering can stood close by -- filled and ready -- and he grabbed it with one hand and began spraying the newly planted hibiscus cuttings with water. He never strayed far from his daughter, who watched him with wide cornflower-blue eyes and her little mouth hanging slightly open.

"Look at this lovely golden blossom, baby!", Geralt cooed as he brought a little orange-golden marigold flower to the child, and placed it gently in her waiting palms, "See how bright the petals are? See how soft they are?"

Bonnie's eyes were round as saucers as she slightly tilted her head and regarded the flower in her hands. Geralt could not help but laugh heartily at her spellbound expression. He held out his own palm, and Bonnie gave him back the blossom. Very lightly, he brushed her arms with the feather-soft petals, then her bulging cheeks, and the little girl -- always so ticklish (just like her Papa) -- squirmed and giggled. "Addah!", she cried, her eyes pleading her Da to stop tickling her.

"All right, all right, here you go...", and with that, the Witcher gently tucked the flower behind his daughter's ear along with a few stray curls, "My princess! What would I do without you, baby?"

He was reluctant to go back to watering the plants, but he could not let his new saplings die. He would have to leave for a contract a few towns away the next morning, and if he did not tend to the young plants now, it would only mean adding to the already-overwhelming list of tasks Jaskier would have to take care of while he was away. He walked a short distance away, and resumed watering the flowerbeds, but his eyes kept darting back to where Bonnie sat playing with her marigold, making sure she did not put the petals in her mouth.

When he approached the rose bush, however, his attention was drawn away from her for just a few seconds by the ugly black fungal spots that had begun besmirching some of the leaves. He bent down to examine them closely, and then ...

"ADDDAHHH!"

***********************************************************************************

Jaskier came home to a quiet cottage.

The bard came to a stop as he walked in through the door that stood ajar, the scene in front of him making his heart leap to his mouth in sudden, smothering consternation.

"Geralt? What is it?"

The Witcher sat on the floor of the now-almost-fully-dark living room of their home, his back against the wall, his knees drawn up. Bonnie lay sleeping in his arms, pressed to his chest. He had not bothered to light the lamps.

"Honey? What's wrong?", Jaskier's voice rose as he rushed towards the duo, automatically sinking to the ground to scoop the two most important people of his life in his arms.

Bonnie came awake with a start, then stared blearily up at Jaskier.

"Appah?", she squeaked. Her voice sounded hoarse, and Jaskier's heart skipped a beat.

"Yes baby, Papa's home", he said in a shaky voice, while his eyes flitted between his daughter and his husband, wide with concern, "Geralt, honey, are you okay? Is she okay?"

"She ... she is okay. Yes", Geralt sighed, his voice heavy with resignation, "We are okay."

Jaskier's heart gave a painful twinge. "I am going to light a few lamps. Then we shall talk while we prepare some dinner", he said, his tone firm as he squeezed Geralt's shoulder.

Once the room and the porch outside were well-lit, Jaskier came back to sit next to his two darlings. Geralt stayed right where Jaskier had found him, unmoving and with his hands clutching his baby girl to his chest like she were his lifeline, as if he had no energy left to move a muscle.

"Appah! Appah!", Bonnie called, squirming a bit in Geralt's lap to make herself more comfortable, "Oo! Oo!"

The girl puckered her lips in a tiny "o" as she slightly lifted up her cotton frock, revealing the side of her tummy, and pointed with her tiny index finger towards what Jaskier noticed was an angry red swelling there.

"What's that, sweetie? Geralt, honey, what happened?", the bard asked frantically, as he scooted closer and placed his fingers gingerly on the red hives marring his baby girl's skin, "Please, Geralt, tell me!"

"An ant. I ... I should not have left her alone while watering the plants. I just ... I thought the ...", Geralt spoke haltingly, in a quiet voice that Jaskier had to strain to hear, choking out the words with difficulty. All the while, he averted Jaskier's eyes, and his head remained hanging, his shoulders drooping as if in defeat. "I placed her on that ... that stone ... the one that Yenna put a protective spell around the other day, so her niece could play on it. Thought it would be safe ... should've known ... should've checked for insects close by ..."

"Oh!", Jaskier's breath left his lungs in a whoosh as he nearly slumped in relief, "An ant-bite. Oh thank goodness ... I had feared ... oh!". He pried his baby from his husband's arms and deposited her in his own lap, rocking her gently and kissing the top of her head. The baby girl sighed happily and leaned against her Papa's chest, sleepy now. 

Surreptitiously, Jaskier wiped away the now dried tear-tracks from Bonnie's cheeks. But Geralt did not miss the movement.

The Witcher let out a quiet but unmistakable strangled sob, startling his mate and his pup.

"Geralt? Honey?", Jaskier sounded alarmed.

"She cried. She ... she cried so much, Jasky! She was in so ... much ... pain! I am ... I am such a worthless father, Jask ... you leave for just a few hours and I ... and I can't even ... can't even protect our daughter from a stupid ... stupid ant!"

Geralt broke down, unable to reign in his emotions and keep a tight leash on his self-control. He drew his knees closer and buried his head behind them, curling up in a tight ball. Bonnie watched her Dada wide-eyed, while Jaskier put a firm hand on Geralt's head.

"Geralt, look at me."

Jaskier was well familiar with these phases. He had, after all, spent close to two decades by his partner and husband's side, and witnessed firsthand the stigma, mistrust, abhorrence, ostracization that Geralt and his kind faced. Had seen, with his heart twisting in agony every time, how Geralt's self-esteem and sense of self-worth had taken hit after hit when the very villagers and townsfolk he had helped by slaying marauding monsters had turned on him. Had felt Geralt's loneliness, his yearning to be accepted and loved as he was, the indelible pain of the knowledge that he had been abandoned by his own mother at the doorsteps of Kaer Morhen. There had been times that Geralt had spoken of himself as nothing less feral than a monster, when in truth, he was one of the kindest people Jaskier had ever known.

Jaskier's love for Geralt had healed him to an extent unimaginable even by Vesemir. His marriage to Geralt, his pregnancy, the arrival of their little girl -- these milestones in Geralt's life had worked miracles on him. Geralt had somehow found a family again, against all odds. He had sisters like Yennefer and Triss who would lay down their lives for him and his mate and pup. He had his brothers-in-arms -- Eskel, Lambert, Aiden. He had his father and mentor, Vesemir. And he had a husband and now an angelic baby girl. There were times he found it hard to convince himself this was all real.

But that did not mean that Geralt was cured. The wounds that had been inflicted upon his heart, his mind and his body for over a century, the trauma that had scarred his soul for years and years, the uncaring, unforgiving cruelty and brutality of the world around him that had trampled his soft, sweet heart of gold, were impossible to erase completely. They were there to stay, though Jaskier's love had soothed over them like a salve. And sometimes, they emerged and made their presence known in the worst of ways, making Geralt helpless and vulnerable in a way that his husband absolutely hated.

Like right now.

But Jaskier knew how to get through to his White Wolf during these phases. And being firm with Geralt was one of the first things he had to do right now.

"Look at me. Now."

Geralt knew that tone. Knew it brooked no argument. 

He raised his tearful gold orbs up to look at his husband.

"It's getting late. So, I am going to feed Bonnie, put her to bed, and then you and I are going to talk. Okay?"

Geralt stayed silent for a few moments, struggling to suppress the sobs tearing through him. Then he gulped, and nodded.

Jaskier busied himself with breastfeeding Bonnie. The little girl was exhausted from the day's events, and more than a little perturbed by her father crying in front of her -- something she had never seen before. Lying in her Papa's lap, she paused in her suckling from time to time to stare wide-eyed at her still very tearful Dada.

"She is worried for her Dada", Jaskier said quietly.

Geralt let out a muffled sob, then scooted forward at top speed and took his daughter back in his arms.

"Dada's sorry. Dada's so, so sorry, baby ... I am sorry I scared you. I am okay. You are okay. We are all okay."

He showered the baby girl with kisses, until she relaxed and began smiling again, clinging tightly to Geralt's shirt.

"I think she is done feeding. Let's put her to bed", said Jaskier.

**************************************************************************************************

"Why did you say that, Geralt?", Jaskier's voice was quiet but firm, making it clear Geralt had no chance of escaping this conversation, "Why did you call yourself a worthless father?"

Geralt sat on the bed, right next to the now-sound-asleep Bonnie, stubbornly looking away from his husband.

"Because I failed her."

Jaskier rolled his eyes so hard they hurt. "Seriously? Why, because an ant bit her? An _ant_?"

"She got hurt. She was in pain. I should have been more careful."

"Sure, you will be more careful from the next time onward. These things happen, Geralt -- it is not like she suffered any serious harm, and you were always right there, to rush to her aid, weren't you? You were there, and you would never ever let her be in any real danger. Yes? You would never let any serious harm befall her, and you would always be there to support her and comfort her and help her heal and grow and become stronger. Don't you see? These small mistakes we are learning from, as parents. This is our first time being parents, Geralt -- we aren't expected to know everything in advance nor foresee every little possibility when it comes to bringing up a child! And she needs to also be out there, with you, enjoying gardening and learning the names of flowers and birds and butterflies from you, playing around in the dirt and getting her clothes and hair messed up -- else how will she come to love Mother Nature and her beautiful creations?"

Jaskier tried to maintain eye contact with the Witcher, hoping that the words would hit home. Geralt still sat slumped, but Jaskier knew he was listening.

"I should have picked her up ... carried her around with me ... she would have been safe then ..."

"Geralt, she was in no real danger. You were seconds away from her, and you were keeping a close eye on her. It's just a little ant-bite, and you already rubbed ointments on it and it's already beginning to heal. The swelling is lessening. Yes, she was in pain for a few minutes, but she knows her Dada is there for her, and she can lean on him and know with unwavering certainty that he will forever be her pillar of strength. Did you see yourself, Geralt? I did, right when I walked into the house. You were clutching her to your chest like she were going to disappear into thin air, love! And did you see how worried she was, watching her Dada cry? Did you see how she clung to you and refused to let go, even though I can tell she drank less milk from me than usual?"

Finally, Geralt looked up to meet Jaskier's eyes.

"Sometimes, I get so scared, Jask. Like ... I don't know how to be a good father. I don't know if I am ... if I understand her needs correctly. What if I am ... what if I make some truly serious mistake? What if I am not able to understand what she needs from me? What if she grows up to think her Dada is not good enough ..."

"That's enough! Geralt, how could you? She loves you. She LOVES you, you gigantic oaf! She is your daughter, and she is seeing day in and day out how hard her Dada is working to keep her safe and sound, hale and happy! She can see -- she can feel -- the love you shower her with every single day, from morning till night! She is blessed with the best Dada in the whole wide world, Geralt of Rivia!"

And that just made Geralt's lips begin to tremble.

Jaskier scooted forward and scooped up the White Wolf in his arms. Geralt buried his face in Jaskier's chest, and allowed the tears to fall freely. Jaskier's arms held him tightly, anchoring him, even as his frame shook with the sobs. Jaskier never denied him these rare moments of open vulnerability when Geralt let go of his self-restraint and cried his heart out, clinging to his husband for dear life.

"I love her. I love her so much, Jask ... she ... she is so precious ... sometimes, all I can do is drown in the fear of losing her ... I can't live without her ... I can't live without you two, Jask ... I can't ... I can't ... please don't ever leave, Jasky ..."

"I know. I know, honey!", Jaskier shushed his sobbing husband, "And trust me when I say, we -- Bonnie and I -- cannot live without you either. You are our world, Geralt. You are our strength, our hope, our shelter, our haven. Our baby girl loves you more than anything, sweetheart. She loves you, and forever will, and you are and forever will be her greatest hero."

Geralt hiccupped as he forced himself to sit up, a small, watery smile now gracing the corner of his lips.

"No. She loves you the most. As she should. The pain you endured to bring her into this world..."

Jaskier laughed quietly, careful to not wake his sleeping Bonnie, then pulled Geralt into a soft kiss. They had not had much time to be intimate in the past several months, but that was a compromise they were willing to put up with if that meant spending the entire day showering their baby daughter with love and attention. Geralt melted into the kiss, allowing his husband to drag him down to the bed and plant a trail of soft, open-mouthed kisses down his jaw and collarbone.

They lay there, panting slightly as they hugged each other close, their eyes lingering on their baby girl, watching her chest rise and fall as she breathed deep in her sleep.

"What's she clutching in her hand, by the way?", Jaskier asked, curious. He had not noticed that earlier -- not surprising, as his mind had been heavy with thoughts of Geralt hurting.

"I ... um ... I think that's a squashed marigold."

"Marigold? You gave it to her?"

"Yeah ... um", Geralt's eyes dipped down as he smiled shyly, "I tucked it behind her ear. She ... looked so pretty! Like an angel come to earth, Jasky ..." he trailed off, colour blooming on his cheeks.

"Oh Geralt!", Jaskier sighed fondly, his eyes twinkling with unshed tears, and then pulled his husband into another deep kiss...


End file.
